You gotta put the past behind ya...

To whom it may concern-

Typically, I am a very opinionated person with STRONG outlooks on different matters. Such is still true today, but I am finding the beauty in the new and unknown. I am letting myself have new and exciting (sometimes not so exciting) experiences and I am learning a vast amount about myself.

The most interesting part about all of this is that I wouldn't be where I am without a certain decision that was made... To move to New York. That's where all this began. Without the shift in focus and friend groups (with my constants there for sure) I wouldn't be the person I am today, and I like her A LOT. Often times people are searching for who they are down a specific path with specific people and a specific goal in mind. And... I have all of those things, but I am not afraid to stray from the path to explore other opportunities.

I know who I am, but I am still finding myself.

Let's all try something new tomorrow!

-Sydney the Destroyer

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You're Back From Outer Space...

To whom it may concern-

I am back you guys... finally. I know, no one missed me. It's cool. I have thoughts.

I think that a couple of my friends would agree that I am a netflix-a-holic. I spend most of my time holed up in solitary confinement with my trusty laptop and snacks binge watching some 90's television show or worse... My biggest pet peeve is not watching shows in order... how can you people do that? I finally watched X-Files in order... and here we go. It's not every day that you get hooked on a show so old that the special effects makeup looks like a drunk 8 year old did them. No. Those days are reserved for days like today, obviously. There's something to be said about a moment when the "monster" or "alien" is revealed in a scene and it makes you audibly gasp at how grotesque the makeup is. They just don't look real. But they aren't CGI either. Which makes me so happy. Then we can take a look back at the Star Trek (Original Series... duh ya know, with Shatner and Nimoy) and we can say the exact same thing. The ALIENS don't look real, but at that time, that's not what the audiences wanted. They wanted chilling stories and actors that were pretty and weren't quite sure how big to be for the cameras in such intimate settings. They wanted a story and a resolution and something to make them experience some type of feeling.

The reason that these shows hold such near and dear places in my heart is because there's a POSSIBILITY that aliens could exist. Now, I don't want you to think that I've lost my mind (lest I located it in the first place) saying that aliens could be real. There is evidence out there proving both points. I have none of it. This is purely my opinion. But, why would we continue to watch a show with such clear viewpoints (I know that Star Trek is set in the future... but that could be our ACTUAL future. You never know. I've always wanted to go to space.) on the situation when we have no desire to pursue such viewpoints. There's nothing wrong with a little curiosity... But that's no reason to QUIT YOUR DAY JOB... looking at you, Tom DeLonge.

Okay, this post took an odd turn. So, in conclusion, love each other. Mind your business. Keep it together. Bless up. Always wear a helmet.

-Sydney the Destroyer

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Dear Stress, No Thanks...

To whom it may concern-

It has come to my recent attention that the amount of curveballs life throws us is NOT in ANY WAY relative to how many curveballs we as people can handle. Everything happens for a reason. Obviously. But that reason is based on circumstance. If one is presented with a choice and they choose a path, then obviously that person could not know the outcome if they chose the other option. So, therefore that choice is a product of circumstance and the proceedings of the choice are now and will forever be the circumstances of the decision.

What do you do with your time? What do you do with your money? Will you ever be good enough? Why are you even trying? Are these the kinds of questions that a normal person should ask themselves everyday? Would asking these questions and answering them internally everyday be harmful or helpful to a normal person? It is said that one should not compare themselves to their neighbors in order to achieve fulfillment and happiness. But, what if you're not motivated to move forward in your life and you become stagnant and you look over and your neighbor has all of a sudden has reinvented their life and they have a nice place to live and a kitty and a corgi and they're happy and they have a nice job and they don't have to worry about making rent and that lights a fire under your ass to step up your game? One shouldn't dislike the person for having everything that you want to have in life. You just want those things. It has nothing to do with the person. It's selfish. Sometimes your decisions in life have to be selfish.

Being selfish doesn't always mean that you selfishly choose whatever YOU want to do whenever. You can selfishly choose to make someone else happy because that's what will ultimately make you happy. You can selfishly choose to make others feel good about themselves because that's what makes you feel good. Being selfish isn't always a bad thing. But, being selfish because you feel like you "have" to in order to further your career and sacrificing your personal life is not a wise decision. At the end of the day, what should make you happiest are the people you're surrounded by. Not by how much you liked your job. There should always be a balance. But, what will you have to give up to find that balance?

-Sydney the Destroyer